some days

 Some days   i just feel

like:(

people ugh):

crying when 

communication backfires.

who, Carma?

doesn't matter. no one i know no one who knows me.

some rando.

And i don't wanna say anything to anyone ever again.

I'll just stay in my corner and keep quiet, okay? 

F. Being neurodivergent is

Hard. some days

i did not mean to hurt anyone's feelings

i did not mean to ruin a mood

i did not know it could be taken that way

i missed the social cues 

or something

i just saw something that made me think something other than what the poster wanted me to see, think, feel, do. so they called me fake and blocked me. whew. i tried to explain and apologies, but i dunno if they saw that reply. 

now someone is out there with their mood ruined. 

because i commented in my weirdo abstract broadstroke way about what i saw, thought, felt. and they don't like what i saw, felt, wrote. 

sigh ❤

some days i feel like the little girl on the back of the trike. The sun is too bright. I feel hot and sweaty. It's itchy. I don't understand what's going on here. What is that thing? What is mom doing? I feel small in a big world that i do not understand. i can't be me. i can't just be me. i have to be careful. i have to say the right thing at all times. 

sigh ❤

goodbye cruel world. i am going back to my daydreams and conversations with an 11D being i call Ruby. 

My siblings sharing a ride on a tricycle, 1953